Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Six Steps to Stop Delaying What You Want to Do

Step One: List the costs and benefits of doing the task you are putting off. Examine each list and weigh each side. If the result of weighing the costs and the benefits points to doing the behavior then proceed to Step Two.

Step Two: Plan a specific step toward accomplishing your goal. The step you decide to take should be easily accomplished a brief period of time. You may have to break down your goal into several components. The old saying that every journey begins with one step applies to setting goals. Choose one step and don't worry about reaching the long-term goal.

Step Three: Take a moment to anticipate any barriers or problems that may interfere with your goal. Anticipating problems can help you to find a solution before you become discouraged. For example, you know that you are going to a party where there are going to be snacks but your goal is to not eat between meals. By anticipating this, you can take steps to eat a meal before you go to the party so that you are full when you arrive.

Step Four: Identify negative thoughts that undermine your effort. Some typical thoughts include:

  • I must accomplish every goal.
  • There is no use in trying because I have failed to accomplish this in the past.
  • There is so much to accomplish, I feel overwhelmed; I don't know where to start.
  • I'm going to be miserable trying to accomplish this goal.

Step Five: Establish a means for accountability. Set up some way to evaluate your progress and share your outcome with at least one other person. Help this individual to know that you are looking for encouragement not criticism. You may want to develop a method for charting your progress or simply develop a rating scale for yourself. For example, you could rate your progress toward your goal on a 1 to 100 scale each day. Make the evaluation simple and not a burden to complete.

Step Six: Plan to reward yourself for progress toward the goal, not just for reaching the goal. The reward can be a simple statement like, "You are doing great!" or you may want to reward yourself with a more lavish reward.

Setting My Goal

What is my goal that I want to accomplish?

If I were to take a step toward that goal today, what could I attempt to do?

What obstacles might I encounter from others that would interfere with this goal? How can I overcome these obstacles?

What internal obstacles might undermine my efforts? How might I prevent these thoughts or attitudes interfering with my effort to reach this goal?

Take a minute to imagine yourself reaching this goal. Now anticipate rewarding yourself with positive thoughts and benefits from reaching this goal. How do you want to be rewarded? Who can you include in your plans to reach this goal? Seek out someone who can hold you accountable without being critical or discouraging.

Lee Horton is a psychologist with more than 25 years treating adults with depression and anxiety. Visit his website http://www.counselinginmemphis.com to evaluate your mood and learn more about Dr. Horton's approach to treating mood disorders.

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